tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-684094023681819935.post5245938737390947824..comments2023-10-10T12:38:41.200+01:00Comments on Musings from a muddy island: Worrying . . .Juliethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18055924620237477722noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-684094023681819935.post-36246694179639170892008-01-28T12:28:00.000+00:002008-01-28T12:28:00.000+00:00I don't feel you should know exactly what your kid...I don't feel you should know exactly what your kids are looking at, certainly after a certain age. There comes a point where you have to trust them enough to talk frankly about the issues and hope they make the right choices.<BR/><BR/>I find it interesting that some people get so frustrated with this subject when to my mind it is no different than the "Sex Ed" question. You wouldn't stop your kid hearing any and all references to sex, depending on their age you'd explain to them what it means. If they're too young they get the Disney version (Consider this your parental controls and internet safety software) and when they're old enough you have "the talk" with them. You don't just continue for as long as you can with the Disney myth until unfortunately one day your daughter finds herself in a situation that she isn't prepared for do you?<BR/><BR/>No, parents need to have the internet safety chat at the same time as the sexual awareness and safety chat. Give your kids your understanding about how they're growing up, pass on your wisdom, and then step back while never being truly out of reach. It's my belief that this way is the best for their development in the end, and the "dangers" really seem to be less possible than a multitude of others that perhaps we pay less attention to.<BR/><BR/>But until they reach that age, the search for an adequate filter software continues :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-684094023681819935.post-41762323521856617912008-01-28T11:02:00.000+00:002008-01-28T11:02:00.000+00:00Yes, I agree that teenagers are aware of a lot of ...Yes, I agree that teenagers are aware of a lot of the issues involved in social networking/chatroom sites etc. But on the other hand, at 14 one tends to 'know best' (certainly better than one's parents) and also to believe one is invincible. She thinks she's chatting to a girl of her own age in Manchester. She probably is. But I know enough to understand that she might, just might, be talking to a clever, patient, biding-his-time man five miles away. <BR/><BR/>On the issue of 'child safe' software: as a 'responsible' parent I make my own judgments about what I allow my children to watch on TV and DVD and Playstation games, guided (though not blindly - I make my own decisions) by the 12,15, 18 etc rating system. There are degrees of sexual and violent imagery which I simply do not wish them to be exposed to and have to deal with. <BR/><BR/>Yet I cannot find a combination of 'safety' settings on their PCs which works in anything like a feasible fashion. I err on the side of liberal access - for a quiet life as much as anything, but this makes me a totally irresponsible parent because I simply don't know, at any minute of any day, EXACTLY what my kids are looking at. And I should, shouldn't I?Juliethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18055924620237477722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-684094023681819935.post-62985847404826523962008-01-28T05:12:00.000+00:002008-01-28T05:12:00.000+00:00monix: "I'll bet your eldest daughter is aware of ...monix: "I'll bet your eldest daughter is aware of the things you are concerned about."<BR/><BR/>This is very likely the case. There was a survey about a year ago that suggested teenagers and older children were very much aware of the issues involved. (Sorry, don't have the URL to hand).<BR/><BR/>The problem with the NSPCC petition and with "child safety" software is that it doesn't work; not only that, it cannot work, even in principle. <BR/><BR/>This is because the problem -- of allowing desirable material through but preventing undesirable material -- is AI-complete, i.e. it would require human-level artificial intelligence, a technology that doesn't exist. (And if it did exist, there would be MUCH bigger issues involved than censorship software).cabalamathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16171752628996901766noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-684094023681819935.post-34819008298665384322008-01-25T16:13:00.000+00:002008-01-25T16:13:00.000+00:00I sympathise with you, J. Youngsters today are sub...I sympathise with you, J. Youngsters today are subject to so many pressures that parents and teachers struggle to understand, never mind know how to deal with. <BR/><BR/>I'll bet your eldest daughter is aware of the things you are concerned about. You could test that, at the same time demonstrating your trust in her, by asking her to talk to her younger siblings about keeping safe online. Listen in - you will probably learn something and also be surprised at how wise she is! <BR/><BR/>Good luck. I'm glad my children are now both safely married and off my hands - at least until the next phone call!monixhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16631194815411019266noreply@blogger.com