Wednesday, 18 June 2008

Fifty reasons why . . .

. . . I'm glad I work outside the corporate world.

I think I would be screaming most of the time.

And that would have me going forward, drilling right down the strategic staircase until I found myself touching base with a workforce reduction situation, resulting in a paradigm shift and a spot of downsizing.

8 comments:

sherry said...

Oh, you left out my 'favorite,' PROACTIVE.

maxine said...

And what about the "low-hanging fruit", "parameterize", "monetize", "value-add", "leverage" (a current pet-hate), etc?
But, yes, a pretty good and all-too-familiar list.
Bit like people who sit through meetings fiddling with their CrackBerrys.

Juliet said...

Maxine - 'low-hanging fruit' was a new one to me, but it's there at number 11 in the list and 'leverage' is number 42 (I've just got rid of the pic because it distracts from the green link to the full 50)

maxine said...

A friend of mine has just reminded me of another regular horror:
"rolling out".
Discretion being the better part of valour, I will say no more of why this topic is of such burning interest!
Sorry I only looked at the pic and not all the other buzzwords so missed my favourite-- I am very glad you spared me them, though! I do urge you to watch out for that low hanging fruit, though, it can be deadly, especially if you eat too much of it.

Juliet said...

Maxine - I am so completely out of the loop [!] when it comes to corporatespeak that I am effectively unemployable now - I'd have to go on a course before I could even attend an interview (in fact many job ads seem to be written in a foreign language now so I would even be able to apply). What is even more alarming (for a non-corporatespeaker like me) is how much of this language filters [drills down?] into people's ordinary, everyday conversation.

Sherry - oops, I confess to using the word 'proactive' rather a lot. I will go and wash my mouth out with soap!

60 Going On 16 said...

It's not just the corporate world that is awash with this garbage, J. Education is just full of it. Sad but true.

maxine said...

Just a quickie, I am reading an article for work, read this, and thought of you:

"We wanted to implement a completely channel-neutral policy," he
said. "We're expecting to achieve significant synergies and savings," he
said.

Juliet said...

maxine - thanks! - this gave me an excuse for a good, long, therapeutic, Friday-morning scream!